Some are born to sing the blues…

Cait Higgins, Sox Superfan

Sidelined by surgery, and I get to miss all the trash-talking fun! A day late and maybe a dollar short, but I guess you could always use my snark and my take on what went down this weekend. So strap it down…
SOOOOO Cubs fans, you finally won a couple. Is this the second series you’ve won all season?

Now that I have read what the Cubs bloggers decided to put on our blog, I have a few things to say about it. First off, I am flattered that they write on our blog more than they write on their own. How about talking about how well they did against us? Nah, just come on and try to rip on us. I don’t understand how Sox fans get a bad rep… people on TV calling us “hillbillies” and those kinds of things. We don’t act like Cubs fans.

We don’t:
-Pour beer on other teams’ right fielders…or any player for that matter
-Pour beer on opposing teams’ fans.
-Throw trash on our field
-Throw back home run balls
-Talk on cell phones and wave at the camera the whole game
-Have phantom ‘injuries’
-Have “curses,” which is a fancy word that works as an excuse for poor baseball
and finally
-Blame fans for fielding errors. Do you guys even remember Alex Gonzalez? Your shortstop who let the ball roll through his legs? Somehow I remember that leading to an 8 run inning by the Marlins. Also, if they were THAT good, don’t you think they would have come back and won it the next day?

We do:
-Watch the game
-Know the score
-Know who won
-Have a parking lot
-Have hygienic bathrooms
-Know our enemies
-Have passion and pride for our team and for the game itself.

One of the Cubs fans posted about how the “best team is on the Northside.” I’d like to put forward some facts that say otherwise. The Cubs MAY have taken 2 of 3, but I would like to remind you that we had the lead in every game at least one time. We also have a better record against the Cubs. 30-27, actually. I know it’s only three games, but you’re trying to slam our team. So… I guess ALL TIME, the better team plays on the Southside. Oh yeah… and we won 90 games last season, the Cubs lost 96. We were in 3rd place last year. Oh man, that doesn’t even compare to 6th place and the WORST record in the whole National League!

Nothing better than a grand slam, right? Well, we hit them two years in a row. If I remember correctly, Iguchi smacked two homers INCLUDING a GRAND SLAM last year in the same game where Michael Barrett got angry about a clean play at the plate that he was blocking WITHOUT the baseball (AKA cheating) and decided to punch AJ… and then get tackled by Scott Podsednik! <3 Then, the Cubs fans’ favorite Sox player, AJ PIERZYNSKI let one fly… with the wind blowing in! How about that! Oh yeah, and Jermaine hit one yesterday… with the wind blowing in! How does that happen? Guess that shouldn’t really be an excuse anymore.

Oh go ahead and make fun of our bullpen. I wasn’t even going to remind you that you have like 8 blown saves already this year. I’ve got 6 words for you: Ryan, Dempster, Will, Ohman, Scott, Eyre. Yikes! Our bullpen really blew it I guess… but still not as bad as being up 5-1 and losing 6-5 in the bottom of the ninth to the Mets.

Cubs fans! Please don’t take cheap shots at the Sox fans. There’s a reason we refer to Cubs fans as “fairweather.” There are only two things that Cubs fans have been saying since we won it all in ‘05 and those are: Sox fans aren’t real fans and they only showed up after we won the World Series yadda yadda yadda, and that we play in the “ghetto,” according to a t-shirt I see Cubs fans sporting as of last season. I can’t speak for everyone, but I spent many summers of my childhood at the ballpark. I’m extremely passionate about my team. I would think that another Superfan blogger would appreciate that. You know, these games mean nothing more than bragging rights, and we know that. I’d rather beat the Indians, but it’s always a good feeling when you beat your crosstown rivals. The worst part about it is hearing fan of a sub .500 team rip on your team… and knowing that that’s ALL you’ll hear about until we sweep you at home. Let it go and concentrate on losing your next series to the Padres.

I’d also like to see one of those Cubs fan go up to the people who live in Bridgeport and the neighborhoods around our park and try to tell them they live in a ghetto and they see their beloved team play in a ghetto. I wonder what kind of reaction they would get. And, um… we know that our ballpark historically isn’t in the best location in Chicago. BUT, I got the pleasure of driving around some of the newly renovated Bridgeport and it looks beautiful! So, that makes the t-shirt pretty much inaccurate. We have a beautiful, clean, and safe park. You don’t have to hold your breath when you walk in, and pray that you get used to the smell. You can look at a gorgeous, well-kept field that doesn’t have massive holes for other teams’ center fielders to break their legs in when they are running for a ball. You’re not sitting on top of the drunk next to you, or getting beer spilled all over you. You can gaze up at our two lit scoreboards: the left field scoreboard and the Jumbotron! There is fun for everyone. I went to two games at Wrigley last year, the Pirates and the Phillies. The only reason I enjoyed the Phillies game was because I got to see Aaron Rowand’s team beat the Cubs! My dad is from Pittsburgh, so we like to catch up on the Pirates, too. Plus, they’re in the Cubs division… all the more reason to like them! Anyway, I was BORED to TEARS with that place. I can understand why no one wants to actually watch a game there. I would have much rather played games on my cell phone the whole time, but I respect the game and Jason Bay way too much. Finally, there’s no rotting concrete chunks to cause brain damage by falling on people’s heads. That’s allllllllll I’m going to say about that.

It also made me really upset to see us referred to as smelly people who drink “bear urine” on the other blog. You guys drink Old Style and Bud Select! Talk about the two worst beers in existance… not that I would know anything about that. Miller sponsors the HAWKS, BEARS, and BULLS as well as the White Sox. I’m sure no Cubs fans ever drink beer when they’re at a Bears game! Anyway, I can’t even breathe when I get near Wrigley Field because of the intense smell of methane that rises from it. I’m not saying anything about Cubs fans themselves, just that their field is disgusting. I am SO glad I wasn’t there yesterday… because I shudder to imagine how bad it smells when it gets wet. I know he didn’t call the players anything or comment on their looks but my goodness are we a fine looking baseball team. I saw Jason Marquis’ headshot on Saturday and nearly busted a stitch I was laughing so hard. It REALLY hurt. They should put a disclaimer up, warning people who had surgery anywhere near their abdominal area to advert their eyes. It is nice to look at some fine athletes while enjoying a game! Just so there is no bias, the only players I am attracted to are Scott Podsednik and Ryan Sweeney. But, say you’ve got Jon Garland vs Carlos Zambrano. No brainer. Mark Buehrle vs. Ted Lilly? No contest! Crede vs Ramierez? And of course, any man who can take a punch is automatically sexier than one who throws a dirty one. So finally, I take offense to being called smelly, ugly, hillbillies, etc. Sox fans are a group of good looking people! Don’t believe me? Just look at the pictures of my fine fellow bloggers!

So I guess I’ll leave you with a couple of things: if I’m wrong, I welcome you to find me in left field, and we can discuss anything further… especially near the end of June. Just make sure you do it between innings, cause nothing irritates me more than people walking around during at-bats.

All I can say is that now, after seeing our bullpen blow two big games, I guess I know what it feels like to be a Cubs fan.